By bizn_fun 
Saying “no” to a boss can feel impossible.
Whatever our job, we all want to impress rather than disappoint.
But ambition can be a very slippery slope. Before you know it, work is coming home with you – seeping into weekends and disrupting time with family and friends.
Experts agree learning to set boundaries is the way to stem the flow.
Career coach Helen Tupper, co-founder of Squiggly Careers, suggests a simple language shift can help reinforce boundaries.
She recommends replacing “I can’t” with “I don’t”.
“I can’t” invites negotiation – people might try to convince you that you actually can,” she says.
But “I don’t” is more definitive and harder to challenge.
For example you can say “I don’t go to meetings after 5pm on a Wednesday because I pick my kids up then,” she suggests.
Model and TV chef Lorraine Pascale says not doing this ultimately led to her burning out.
Alongside her television career, she opened a patisserie in Covent Garden and published a series of cookbooks, all whilst raising her daughter.
“I just wasn’t very good at saying no.
“You don’t want to upset people, everyone’s feeding stuff in your ear as to what you should be doing. So you just keep going,” she told The Woman’s Hour Guide to Life.
She adds that her perfectionism, including personally approving every recipe in her books, didn’t help.
For Lorraine, burnout manifested physically and mentally – including “not wanting to go near” cakes.
“It was like an all-body reaction – a tightness in my chest,” she explains. “I was having arguments with myself. A lot of self-blame, a lot of guilt, and a lot of tiredness.”